Musings from the mind of the entrepreneur

Self-employment starts with  an ache.  For something more.  Something beyond what you show up each day to do.  But it’s really, really scary to trust what that next step is going to be.

So you shelve that idea for a while.  It’s too overwhelming to think that you can go it alone.  Safer to just show up and be told what to do.  But if you are truly destined for self-employment, that drive will continue to be there.

It will bubble up in meetings where you realize you could take the direction of the company in a better direction.  You could facilitate a better event.  You start to see that you have leadership qualities but the people around you are so caught up in what they are supposed to do and presenting a decent image to their bosses that anything you might have to share goes unnoticed.

So you get frustrated.  You go home at the end of the day tired.  Too tired to exercise.  You plop and watch TV.  You look forward to the weekend where you at least will have some freedom to be away from the office.

You live 5 days in a job you didn’t create, and you have 2 days to be in a world you want.  That’s not a great payoff.  Over 30 years of working that amounts to a lot of days dictated by someone else.

It’s not worth the payoff.  I know someone who has worked for 30 years, sucking it up and he has got a whole host of health problems.  His solution after 30 years was finally to buy a vacation home in the woods to retreat to on weekends.  Better late than never!

Do I feel I’ve made any mistakes?  Do I have any regrets in self-employment?  Not really.  I focus on what I have accomplished and learned about myself:  I became a licensed school.  I stopped giving myself away for free.  I learned to appreciate more of the world.  To look at things from a bigger perspective.

Early on, I learned to also be very frugal…then, over the years, I learned to live more in abundance.  To dream.  To not hold back.

To be available.  To see how far I can go.

Entrepreneurs who love what they do are available emotionally.  They have followed their heart and so their heart is more accessible.

They are risk takers.  They confront fear daily.  Today, I open my heart and see where it leads me!

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