Meeting Fate as an artist

A pinprick of light through the door,

Sparkling amber dot in the darkness,

Allowing a view to the outside world.

Or is it a view into the inside?

Who is looking at who?

Why don’t I open the door?

Safe inside my room.  Safe from having to explore.  Contained in the familiar.

But the light that shines through the eyepiece is from the world beyond and keeps beckoning…come, take a closer look.

Unlock the door…..

Wait!  No!  It’s moving too fast, let me take my time.

The eyepiece is patient.  Whenever you are ready.

I hold the handle to the door, turning it, practicing what it might be like to open.

I think of what it would be like to go outside, a different person.

I imagine wearing extravagant clothes.  I imagine painting for days.

I imagine going out there, into the world as an artist.

A dress rehearsal, over and over, in my mind.

Ok, now, now, I’m going to open it.  I take a breath.

Slowly, cautiously, I turn the door knob.

Am I really ready?

The light enters in, filling the room, blinding my eyes.

Blinking, I realize I’m actually awake.

Blinking again, I can finally see.

 

By Eileen Dey, 3am in the darkness of the early morning

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