A moment of lightness

lightA few days ago I participated in the Seattle Sing-A-long on my front porch.  It was an uplifting few minutes that lasted within my heart well into that evening.  https://www.facebook.com/plugins/video.php?href=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.facebook.com%2Feileen.dey%2Fvideos%2F10157466250793583%2F&show_text=0&width=267“>Here is the video.

It seems every day in some way, finding a method, technique or distraction to maintain lightness is an important goal amidst the heavy seriousness that is the reality of this situation.

This is not an easy effort, in fact, most days I rely on a lot of external events, like the sing-a-long to pull me through.

My morning meditations help set the day but my emotions often flux between being patient and then being frustrated.  Of being overwhelmed and then being bored.  Of being worried and then being perfectly calm.

The mornings and evenings are often more emotionally ‘level’ than the day itself.  That much I notice.

My cats and my partner keep me socially sane but I am grateful for my online community.  I’ve been working on updating my Youtube channel after last delving into it um, 7 years ago?  I was busy doing a lot of in-person events for a very long while.  Gosh how time flies.

Maybe I’ll put some of the virtual meetings I’m doing on the channel.  Or maybe some of the classes.  Or just me walking around with my camera phone showing how a Reiki master deals in a crisis.   I’ve never done video of my play with clay.  All possible content for the future.

Before this time, I usually would have some kind of event or activity each week to put on my calendar to ‘look forward to’.  I still have events I’m involved with and show up for.  But the ‘looking forward’ component has definitely shifted.  Making plans is very short-term.

I feel more cautious, not even ‘cautiously optimistic’.  Not quite on guard, but just hesitant most days.  Lot’s of waiting and seeing.  I know I’m not alone.

I’m not focused on ‘what the world will be like after all this’ because no one knows despite all their education, expertise and intuition.

I find the practice of gratitude to be most helpful because it keeps me present and aware of whats right in front of me.  Today, that practice manifested with myself playing the didjeridoo and Richard playing a flute while our cats looked on with great curiosity of the sounds we were making and laughing with.  A moment of lightness.

For now, I’m content when I do find a moment of lightness and with that I can shine brightly.  That’s all I can do.

Copyright Eileen Dey Wurst

Can you be happy for 100 days in a row?

This is a great challenge and I’m up for it.  Are you?  Most people who tried it couldn’t complete the 100 days stating that they had ‘no time’.  But I beg to differ.  Even if it’s only for the moment, each day, can you make space for happiness?

This is actually a movement, which I only just found out about:  http://www.100happydays.com/

But for the last few days, I believe I’ve been tapping into it.  I stated an intention at the beginning of summer for ‘the return of frivolity’.  This weekend, my friends and I made time to connect, have fun and be more in the moment.  One evening it was salsa dancing, the othe2014-06-29 11.54.22r was going to see a movie and yesterday was probably the biggest celebration of frivolity, the 40th anniversary of the Seattle Pride Fest.  2014-06-29 11.36.27I haven’t been to it in over 10 years, and to see so many people come out and express who they are, was truly amazing and inspiring, and for a sustained period of about 4 hours, I was incredibly happy!!2014-06-29 11.34.32

So today, I start with happiness by writing about it and making space for it.  I’m happy I have some time this morning to write.  It shifts my attitude towards possibilities.  Looking forward to the journey!!!

Eileen Dey 2014

 

Ride the carousel!

Last night was a drippy, rainy evening in Seattle.  I drove down to the waterfront to go to a dance hall but try as I might, I couldn’t find it.

I kept walking up and down the sidewalk, retracing my steps, certain I was in the right area and then thought, maybe it had closed?!  I was sopping wet by then (because of course, living in Seattle, I never carry an umbrella).

After about a half hour of trying to find the hall, I needed to get out of the rain.  I found myself at the game  arcade and carousel (that was still open and very empty of customers).  I had never been in there all the years of living in this town.  It’s where tourists went, not residents…

The clerk behind the counter looked bored that no one was coming in  that night (and probably waiting to go home).  So, spontaneously, I asked her, ‘Can I ride the carousel?’.  She looked amused, this grown, rain-soaked woman wanting a ride on the merry-go-round at 8:30 at night.

But, she said it was still open.  So, I paid my $1.50 and climbed on board.  The clerk even rang the bell for me.  And of course, I had to take a picture to document the experience.  After I did that, I put my phone away and just enjoyed the ride, and reminded myself of the times when I was a kid and we didn’t take photos of everything, we didn’t have to capture the moment ‘permanently’, we lived in the moment.  For the next several minutes I gave myself permission to live in the moment, watching the arcade spin around me, seeing Puget Sound through the windows of the hall, listening to the Carney music…

And then, the carousel started slowing down, coming to an end.  I got off and thanked the clerk who looked genuinely happy I had yielded over to my child-self.  Well, that’s my perspective.  I think the clerk was happy to witness a grown woman having fun before she closed for the night.

Walking back out into the rain, I could feel an inner warmth.  That was fun!  Even though I couldn’t find the dance hall I was looking for, I found a bit of joy spurred on by the magic of the merry-go-round.  And in the process, came back into the moment.

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